Join | Frequently Asked Questions
Is Delta Lambda Phi a real fraternity or a “pretend” fraternity?
Delta Lambda Phi is a real fraternity in every sense of the word. Delta Lambda Phi is a 501(c)7 tax-exempt organization, modeled on other collegiate Greek societies. It has a formal pledging process, a coat of arms, a fraternity pin, a national convention and chapter programs that conform to National Interfraternity Council policies.
Do you have to be a student to join Delta Lambda Phi?
We have three types of chapters — campus-based, multi-campus-based and community-based.
- Campus-based chapters usually must obey their college or university requirements requiring that one must be a student to join to chapter.
- Multi-campus-based chapters may only allow students from several area schools to join, or they may allow a mixture of students and non-students to join.
- Community-based chapters permit non-students to join.
By allowing non-students or postgraduates to join Delta Lambda Phi, gay men who didn’t attend college or who were denied the Greek experience in college due to anti-gay bias can enjoy the fraternity experience after all!
Does Delta Lambda Phi discriminate?
No. All men, regardless of age, race, socioeconomic background, religion, or sexual orientation, are welcome to apply for membership. There are no “litmus tests” concerning membership eligibility.
Does Delta Lambda Phi allow straight members?
Yes, Delta Lambda Phi has straight Brothers. One of the chief strengths of Delta Lambda Phi is its tremendous diversity.
You said “all men” are welcome to join Delta Lambda Phi; does that mean women are excluded?
Delta Lambda Phi has visited the topic of women members several times. In 1992, the Fraternity’s governing body decided to remain exclusively male rather than going coed. The reasoning being, if straight men can have a “traditional” (i.e., non-coed) Greek experience, gay men should be able to have it as well.
As well, gay men, by virtue of their being gay men, go through a unique, shared social experience. Delta Lambda Phi is a way for gay men of varying backgrounds (sometimes radically varying backgrounds) to find common ground in that experience. Those who claim that our lesbian friends, as much as we love and support them as comrades-in-arms, have the same social experience as gay men, are, frankly, deluding themselves. Our lesbian friends have the option of pledging our “sister” sorority, Lambda Delta Omega.
How does one join Delta Lambda Phi?
Chapters and colonies host publicized, periodic membership drives called “Rush.” If you are interested in joining, simply go to an open Rush party and meet the Brothers. Rush parties are a way of learning more about Delta Lambda Phi and provide an opportunity to see if the Fraternity is for you. Rush parties are also the way Brothers find out more about you.
At the end of the Rush period, Brothers select the men they would like to invite to pledge the Fraternity. ‘Bids’ are offered to the men, and they may, of course, either accept or reject the bid. If they accept, the men become pledges and undergo an intensive, roughly eight-week pledge period, during which they learn more about the Fraternity and bond as a group. Pledge who successfully complete all the requirements of the pledge period are eligible for full Brotherhood.
Why don’t Brothers of Delta Lambda Phi just join the gay student group or a local gay advocacy group?
They can do both! Delta Lambda Phi does not compete with other social groups. The number of special-interest groups in the gay community is amazing, and Delta Lambda Phi supports the existence of them all. In the gay community, there are roles for ACT-UP, Dignity, the Log Cabin Republicans, the Gertrude Stein Democratic Club and even the Gay Birdwatchers.
Delta Lambda Phi fills a niche that had been unfilled until 1986; it provides a place for gay men to have purposeful and dignified social, recreational, and service activities. The Fraternity was founded to allow gay men a place in which to form quality, lifelong friendships with other gay men — a place to find Brotherhood. Brotherhood is something extremely hard to find in a bar, for instance; and while we agree other gay social groups are important, it’s equally hard to find friendships as strong as Brotherhood in them as well.
Why would gay men, who are regularly ostracized by society at large, form a group that is exclusive (i.e., it selects its members rather than having an open-door policy)?
This is a legitimate question. One of the wonderful things about the gay community is its inclusiveness. However, the specific mission of Delta Lambda Phi — to form bonds of Brotherhood between gay men — precludes us from having an “open-door” policy. Frankly, there is no way a pledge class of 75 men will bond as closely as a group of 15 does. It is the very nature of the activates we run to foster those bonds — not mean-spiritedness or exclusivity — that makes us limit our membership. While it is quite difficult to sit down and evaluate pledges, the process serves the greater good of the Fraternity.
Aren’t you being assimilationists?
We’re not entirely sure what being assimilationist means. If a gay man was elected to the U.S. Senate — a bastion of straight, white males — would he be an “assimilationist?” If a gay man is a whiz on Wall Street — another straight, white-male bastion — is he an “assimilationist?” If a gay man wins a gold medal at the Olympics — overwhelmingly a bastion of straight men and women — is he an “assimilationist?” Brothers of Delta Lambda Phi are proud of being gay. One of our mottoes is “Make Your Presence Known,” and we certainly do; we simply feel that any thing a straight man can be able to do, a gay man should be able to do — that includes going Greek.
Is there hazing in the pledge process?
No. Delta Lambda Phi expressly forbids hazing in conjunction with any Fraternity activities.
